A recent conference in Illinois gathered hundreds of Catholics together from across the U.S. who are striving to grow in holiness while struggling with the same challenge — same-sex attraction.

The organization Courage International, which offers pastoral support for men and women who experience same-sex attraction and have chosen to live chastely, held the July 25–28 conference.

Courage has 175 chapters throughout 37 states and nine countries. The apostolate offers sessions on guidance for pastoral accompaniment each year. It also offers a Catholic spiritual support group for relatives and friends of people experiencing same-sex attraction known as “EnCourage,” which includes more than 75 chapters worldwide.

More than 200 attendees — among them those who struggle with same-sex attraction and their friends and family — gathered at the lakeside facilities of the University of St. Mary of the Lake and Mundelein Seminary. In addition to fellowship, the attendees attended relevant talks, rosary prayer, Masses, and all-night Eucharistic adoration.

What is Courage? 

“From the beginning, Courage has truthfully explained the Church’s teachings with great compassion, making sure to speak positively of God’s love for his beloved children and his desire for each of them to fulfill a unique role in his plan for the salvation of the world,” Father Colin Blatchford, the current associate director of Courage, told CNA. 

“One might distill all these teachings and pastoral recommendations into a short statement: God does not care about orientation, he cares about holiness,” he said. 

Courage adheres to the Catholic Church’s teaching on homosexuality, which holds that homosexual acts are immoral and that “homosexual persons are called to chastity” (Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2359) while calling for “respect, compassion, and sensitivity” (CCC, 2358) toward people who experience same-sex attraction. 

“We all have temptations and sufferings as a result of original sin. Some of us even have compulsive habits to certain sins. God does not ask for immediate perfection, he asks us to grow in holiness each day,” Blatchford explained. “This sentiment is particularly what drew me to Courage.” 

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“Let us aid one another to grow a little in holiness each day, for if we are holy we have no need to worry,” he said.

Courage highlights living chastely and, in accordance with the Catholic Church’s teaching on homosexuality, promoting a life dedicated to Christ as well as a spirit of fellowship and friendship. 

“We ought to say I am a person with same-sex attraction. Getting the terminology right is so clarifying, and my identity is in Christ Jesus,” said Father Tadeusz Pacholczyk during his talk on science and healing. 

Courage was founded in 1980 by Father John Harvey, who directed the organization for its first 28 years of existence. Cardinal Terence Cooke, archbishop of New York at the time, wanted to start an outreach program for those who are experiencing same-sex attraction and wish to live chastely. The organization was first endorsed by the Holy See in 1994. In 2016, the Catholic Church gave it canonical status, making it the only canonically-approved apostolate of its kind. 

‘Spiritual and psychological realities’ 

Blatchford noted that Courage invites speakers who can address “the spiritual and psychological realities that our members are experiencing.”

“This builds the confidence of our members to respond in truth and love to themselves and others.” 

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The conference also highlights “the cultivation of chaste friendships,” through which “our members come to recognize that a chaste life is lived not in loneliness but in rich and varied loving relationships,” Blatchford explained. 

Blatchford said the conference gives people “hope” and a sense of “solidarity.”

“Joining together regularly and discussing our struggles and triumphs allows for our members to recognize that the goal is not the cessation of a particular feeling or orientation; rather the goal is holiness,” he explained. “If we help each other to live saintly lives, nothing else matters and we shall find happiness in this life and in the next.”

Courage also ran a simultaneous conference in Spanish, which was attended by about 100 people. 

Support from clergy

The conference opened with a Mass concelebrated by 26 clergy. Bishop Ronald Hicks of the Diocese of Joliet, Illinois; Auxiliary Bishop Peter Byrne of the Archdiocese of New York; and Bishop Mark Seitz of the Diocese of El Paso, Texas, attended the conference. 

“I want to share with everyone not only my great support but also my abundant prayers,” Hicks said after Mass. “May God bless you, this apostolate, and everyone, today and always.”

More than 40 clergy members also gathered for the “Clergy Day,” a dedicated day held before the conference that was designed to inform clergy on pastoral accompaniment for people with same-sex attraction.

Toward community

The conference was designed to help attendees progress from finding healing to an emphasis on community, Blatchford explained.

The first night of the conference begins with all-night adoration, where priests offer a healing service, exposition, and confessions. Then, Saturday evening features a social.

“In a way it is a sort of progression,” Blatchford explained. “Many come with burdens and struggles and so the healing service and confession begin the conference, so we can ‘clean up’ or ‘attune’ ourselves to what we are beginning. Then we have an opportunity for an extended intimate loving union with Our Lord. Then having received the love of God, we go out to our neighbor and share with them what we have received from the Father — this would be the social.” 

The retreat talks included “Appreciating the Fatherhood of God,” “Liturgy and Belief,” and “Science and Healing” as well as talks for women and men: “The Spiritual Fruitfulness of Living as Daughters of God” and “Spiritual Sonship,” respectively. 

“On those days when the storm clouds are closing in, it’s a great challenge but a great opportunity to pause and to strive and see it as a gift,” said Father Kyle Schnippel during his opening presentation on the fatherhood of God. “Can I pause and think: Thank you, God, for this gift for causing me to rely on you?” 

“The thing about these Courage conferences is that I can feel very distinctly the presence of the Holy Spirit,” said Father Thomas J. Loya, co-founder and director of the Tabor Life Institute, during his talk on “Retrieving the Sacramental, Catholic, Human, Liturgical Worldview.”

“And if you’re a supporter or you work for Courage or EnCourage, you are doing something heroic,” he said. “So I’m among heroes.”